Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Trainwreck Ed. 1.6: Juxtapose

A new update on our pal "Mickey" who ripped the face off a 4 year old earlier this year.  It looks like Mickey is doing just great!

Hell, Mickey should have ripped the face off a 4 year old SOONER!  Now, he has a new BONE!

Of course, that dastardly devil that put POOR OL MICKEY in SUCH a bad situation, AIN'T doing so well.  Consider:

Lets check the scorecard:

Mickey:  74,099 supporters.
Kevin:  967 Supporters.

That's 75 Mickey supporters for every Kevin supporter!   Remember, according to new math, the Mickey supporters support BOTH the dog and the kid!

More on Mickey and Kevin:

Vol 1
Vol 2
Vol 3
Vol 4
Vol 5
Vol 6

Aren't you all just GLAD at how well Mickey is doing?   To all you dog lovers:  That 60 year social engineering project you've been working on... you know, the one where everyone must be convinced that ALL dogs are absolutely perfect, and that NO dog or dog owner can do wrong, ever?   That the life of an individual dog is worth infinitely more than every other living thing on earth?  Well, it has paid off in spades.... look above, these are the fruits of your labor.  YOU own this one and every other situation like it. 

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Moar gun P0rn

It seems as though life itself has let us down.  Is there anything to be happy for, anymore?

The answer is - YES INDEEDY!  Yes, Mabel you CAN take your neighborhood back - and here is how you do it!

A little video I put together today.  All photos are mine.

Click here for info from the Ruger website.

A decent review video:

I'd encourage you to "YouTube" Ruger LC380.

Here is another video:

Some background - I'd rented a Ruger LCP, which is even smaller.  My hands are above average in size and I just could not articulate the LCP.  The LC380 is "just right".   I have fired hundreds of rounds through this gun with not a single problem.   As usual, Ruger's quality and dollar value are exceptional.

Ruger also makes the LC9, which is a nearly identical piece chambered in 9mm.  I estimate this would kick a lot more, but would have a lot more stopping power.

A good review of the LC9:

Have a great weekend!

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Dress for success at Pet Stupid

Pursuant to my pre-essay on Pet Unintelligent, welcome to the 3rd Animal Uncontrol POLL!

Here is the deal... you MUST head to Pet Stupid Smart.  For some reason (make it up, it doesn't matter), this chore is unavoidable.  However, they are having an XXL Super Pit Bull adoption day that day.   Additionally, they have ALL been rescued by Best Friends Animal shelter and the ALL have a history of attacking humans and other animals.  What to do?

Choices for successful dress at Pet Stupid.  Consider all of your options and make your choice carefully!  Poll is on the upper right.

Option 1:  SWAT.   With this fashionable full body Kevlar outfit, all decked out with select fire assault rifle, hundreds of rounds of ammunition and full face protection, how can you go wrong at Pet Smart?  Note, I would stay in the parakeet section if I were you!

Option 2:  Medieval Knight.  Guns ain't your thang?  No worries!  It would take Fido hours to chew through one of these full body beauties!  That broadsword will make sushi out of that supermauler in no time!

Option 3:  Serial Killer.  As per option (2), a good option in Communist countries such as New Jersey.  The hockey mask will protect your face PLUS that McColluch will slice up that supermauler like warm butter!

Option 4:  Exo skeleton.  Hey, if it will work on a monster alien, it should work on that neighborhood supermauler!  Right?  (OK, see option #1).

Option 5:  Cyborg.  Most pit bull victims (the one's that live, anyway) wind up without arms and legs, anyway, so why not go all in and replace nearly everything with computer parts?   Try to take a bite of out of THIS guy Fido!  

Hoist at Pet Stupid

So, another god pet owner is hoist by their own petard at PETSMART. What type of lunatic frequents one of those places, anyway? Personally, I won't go within a mile of one. Showing up at one of those places with a SMALL PET merely adds to the stupid points. Here is a better idea... douse yourself in blood and jump into the shark tank at the aquarium... THAT WOULD BE SAFER.

Look, Pet Unintelligent holds regular adoptions for Pit Bulls and other dangerous dogs.  Supermaulers are as welcome THERE as a new set of golf clubs at the Obama White House.  WHY can't you buy dog food and chewy toys at the regular grocery or off the internet? Why the inclination to head to Pet Stupid Smart? Are you insane? Are you looking for a good excuse to kill a Pit Bull? Consider this example from the archives:

Note what Mr. Kersey is doing... he is putting himself in harms way and then killing anyone who tries do kill him. Doesn't he know he has no right to ride the subway after 9pm?  He has the same right to safety on the subway (essentially, none) as you do at Pet Stupid Smart.  Am I getting through to you now?

In any case, I figure if you are going to head to Pet Stupid Smart you may as well show up prepared. Hell, anything worth doing, even if it is the wrong thing, is worth doing right! Right?