Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Best use for a dead Pit Bull?

There are 1 million (1,000,000) or so Pit Bulls destroyed in the USA every year. Most are PTS, some are put down by other “means” (evil chuckle).

Now, there has to be SOME good use for all of those carcasses! What do YOU think we should do with them? Burying them in the backyard is just plain wasteful!

Now, on to the 2nd poll – best uses for a dead Pit Bull! Read all the options and choose your answers carefully!

Option 1: Barbeque. Invite all the neighbors and put all that protein to good use! Now, all you need is honey baked beans and cole slaw and you are all set for the Fourth of July!

Option 2: Fish Bait. Get your fishing license and bait your hook with a chunk of “Killer”! Let something bite on THEM for a change! Reel in some tasty Grouper or Mackerel with a hunk of your neighborhood nuisance!

Option 3: Compost. Vegetarian? No worries... no need to miss out on all those good mauler-bred nutrients! Your veggies will grow to competition size with some nicely aged and fermented Pit Bull in your back garden! Note: Recommend feeding the carcass through a wood chipper prior to composting. Remember to turn your compost regularly!

Option 4: Bio-diesel. Rid your neighborhood of maulers AND reduce our dependence on foreign oil in one shot! Now, you can thunder down the avenue in your Mercedes guilt free, and with a dose of smugness! Happy Motoring!

Option 5: Shooting Target. So, your .357 mag hollowpoint DID drop that mauler? Let me ask you something... was that the LAST mauler in existence? Unlikely. THEY are breeding them faster than you can shoot and YOU need to exercise that trigger finger.


  1. oh buttercup, you are such a rascal!

    1) compost
    2) target practice
    3) biodiesel
    4) fish bait
    5) BBQ

  2. Ooh...I really shouldn't derive any form of amusement from this. Biodiesel.

  3. You missed my fav- PET FOOD!!!
    The pet food industry is always in need of cheap, available, high protein inputs, and bone meal. Why not feed other animals pit bull? It would be pay back for all of the pets they have killed. You can render the rest into all types of stuff.

    1) Target practice!
    2) Compost- mainly because of the wood chipper part.
    3) Fish Bait- just LOL on this.
    4) BBQ- I bet pit is too tough, but I am sure someone could smoke it and make it tasty.
    5) Biodeisel- Just because I cannot imagine this working.

    1. Pit dispatcher -

      You are probably right - Now that I think about it some more, I now estimate that pit bulls are unlikely to be a good biodiesel feedstock (its primarily oils and fats that get rendered into fuel). Could probably squeeze something out of it though.

  4. buttercup, your poll on the side bar is not working.

  5. Compost. The idea of pittie's ugly carcass going through the wood chipper puts a smile on my face.

  6. I don't know what the hell is going on with blogger... it looks like the poll is still down.

    In any case, my preference is
    1) Biodiesel (I have 2 diesel vehicles to feed).
    2) Fish Bait. You could always grind them up for chum, too.
    3) Shooting Target... would be a great way to test the terminal ballistics of various rounds.
    4) BBQ - I think I would like cooking it a lot more than I would like eating it.
    5) Compost.

    1. i've experienced weirdocities with blogger polls too.

      4) BBQ - I think I would like cooking it a lot more than I would like eating it.


  7. i'm thinking you all have a deadset hide calling pitbull advocates nutters when you all carry on like this?? hey are you serious or are you just trying to stir pitbull owners up to get some material for your foamer pages, cause you need all the help you can get, selling the lie was a tall order to start with but your a merry band of misfits are you not?? pmsl!!

  8. hey what about Chinese buffets instead of them using neighborhood cats they can gave endless uses of pit dishes! general tsos blue pit,sesame pit,pit Szechuan, red nosed with oyster sauce, happy family pit, n so on n cats can be safe from Asians!

  9. Why not butcher the nearly one MILLION excess pit bull that are euthanized yearly in the US for the meat and ship it to China? Cut down the trade deficit.

    1. Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winner! Out of the box thinking is always appreciated. Thanks for writing.

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