Thursday, June 7, 2012

Countering pro-barking propaganda Part IV

The owners of yard barkers invest a considerable effort in evading their obligations.  I believe if they invested HALF of that effort in simply controlling their dogs the barking dog scourge would not exist.

A neighbor with a chronic barker is a death of a thousand cuts.  My brother was a dog attack victim and is NOW a bark victim and that barking has taken an even more significant toll.  The great dane next door wakes him up EVERY NIGHT.  He is working on getting the miscreant evicted, and she should be gone shortly.   He also got treated to a bag full of dog shit on his front porch the other week… I wonder who’s it was?  Absolutely CHARMING.

Barking is a toxic pollutant and intolerable irritant.  It is used as a torture method by military and police organizations.  Not bothered by barking?  Well, the shrill, abrupt noises DO affect you whether you realize it or not.  It affects your body’s endocrinal and autonomous nervous system:  You do NOT “tune it out” people!  As a matter of fact, it’s rather like secondhand smoke, but faster acting!  It destroys property values and makes people sick.   It does absolutely NO ONE any good, including the dog!

How can animal welfare organizations not take the lead on this?  They claim to be “animal lovers” but have no problem allowing an animal to bark until it is hoarse and exhausted?  Do they think that a dog that barks throughout the day and night is a happy dog?   Either they are idiots or they think that everyone else is:  Yes, I am sure that the dog chained to a truck axle 24x7 and barking nonstop is a happy, well adjusted dog.  Pfft!  Pursuant to my “rock and a hard place” essay, the upswing in noise pollution contributes heavily to the PR disaster for dogs and owners in general.  SHAME ON THEM.

Hey Dummy:  The dog chained to a truck axle and barking 24x7 is TOTALLY MISERABLE, has NO QUALITY OF LIFE and that is NO WAY for ANY CREATURE TO LIVE.  Their entire world is a patch of bare dirt packed with urine and feces.  They are subject to any and all kinds of weather.  They are vulnerable to predators.  They get no exercise.  They have no socialization.  In my opinion, you’d be better off putting it down before subjecting it to a miserable life like that.  ALL outdoor penning, tethering and chaining should be summarily banned:  Any animal kept in such conditions should be impounded IMMEDIATELY and the owner banned from owning pets FOREVER.  Anyone who would create this problem is a low-life who deserves nothing but contempt from EVERYONE.  They torment their animals and destroy human health in the process.  DOWN WITH THEM.

The above is #9 on my “Why is it so annoying, anyway?” list.  Anyone who has even a molecule of compassion for any animal will be driven insane by the endless screams of the miserable, tormented animal across the street. 

The list of mindless drivel spewed by these miscreants continues.  Numbering scheme picks up where Part III left off.  Note that ALL of these talking points are used to excuse the behavior of dangerous dogs as well.

16)  He is doing his job.  Their point being, they have “hired” their dog to bark at anything and everything day and night.  So, when he barks at you when you are walking from your house to your car, he is really a “good dog” as the entire neighborhood needs to be “alerted” about that exceptional event, especially at 2am. 

Counterpoints:  He needs a change in job description.  If I hired someone to yell at you all the time, would you accept this excuse?  I doubt that.  “Doing my/his job” did not work at Nuremburg and it doesn’t work here either, pal.  FAIL.

17)  He was provoked.  This is similar to “He is doing his job”.  Their point being, the dog (and by reference, the owner) are fully empowered to set off a loud alarm throughout the community at even the most trivial event:  A leaf falling, a neighbor looking out the window, the wind blowing, someone walking down the street, etc… etc… ad nauseum.

Counterpoints:  The threshold for setting off a loud alarm is very high.  You don’t set off the city air-raid siren every time you see a bird flying overhead.  You don’t set off the fire alarm in a hotel because you saw someone smoking a cigarette on TV, or you are bored and want attention.  So, why do you and your dog get to do THE SAME THING?   False alarms are toxic and counterproductive. False alarms are a crime, buddy.  From now on, confine your noises to your OWN space.  FAIL.

18)  You don’t understand dog behavior.   Their point being, the endless loud barking really DOES serve a worthwhile purpose but it is way over the head of us unwashed, uneducated rabble.  Moreover, you must have a complete understanding of the torture device in question before offering any criticism.

Counterpoints:  A complete understanding of the weapon in question is irrelevant.  I could just as easily shoot your dog with an AK-47 and claim “YOU do not know of Kalashnikov’s genius you troglodyte!”. All I need to know is that you and your dog kept a sick kid up all night and now they have to go to the hospital.  Keep trying, champ.  FAIL.

19)  Why don’t you just move?  Their point being, they are lords of the land and can do anything to anybody within the (their) jurisdiction.  Therefore, if you take issue with their reign of terror, you must leave the (their) kingdom. 

Counterpoints:  Credit to commenter “LDS” on this one:  This is a good one!  This fails on MANY levels.  First, do they REALLY want me to move out and thus force real estate and rental values down further?  They have to examine what it’s truly worth to them to maintain their barking lawn ornament.  Second, they are NOT lords of the land and they have a responsibility to confine their noises to THEIR space.  Third, if you are forced to move due to someone else’s bad behavior, that sounds like a juicy actionable tort to me.  OK, I am not a lawyer nor do I play one on TV, but if you are forced out of your home by a neighbor wouldn’t they be liable for your moving expenses?  You are away from the miscreant at THEIR expense!  Again, I am not giving legal advice but it’s something to consider.  Lastly, I should NOT alter my behavior to suit YOUR consumer choice to own a dog AND house it in lousy conditions:  I am going to stay PUT and YOU are going to stop raising the noise level in my home!  You lose, buttercup.  FAIL.

20)  It is a rescue.   This is from esteemed colleague “Your Quiet Neighbor” (on my blogs list to the right).  I’d heard this one from the scumbags across the street but had forgotten about it.  In any case, their (the scumbag’s) point being:  I have “rescued” this dog from a shelter and as such are hereby entitled to a pass on any and all behavior against the dog and everyone else.  The fact that they paid 50 bucks to the county shelter, took a dog home and tied it to a tree in their yard (leaving it there 24x7) to yell and scream endlessly elevates them WAY past level of Mother Teresa.  They are truly God’s among us!  We should bow down at their feet.

Counterpoints:  They are in fact, complete bottom feeding low life scum.  They are unspeakably vile.  They are pukes.  Part of this problem belongs to society at large that grants so much social capital on “rescuers”.  As per Your Quiet Neighbor, the term “rescue” belongs to those who truly rise above the day to day, go beyond the call of duty, and risk all to help another.  The term “rescue” has been completely degraded by these miscreants.  In any case, their newfound “status” does NOT entitle them to disrupt all of my interests with their vile, disgusting behavior.

My low life neighbors used this on ME.  Take a look at this video and let me know what you think of these “rescuers”.  Note there is a colorful expletive in the video:
The doghouse was way too small for him and probably flooded out.  And, yes, the owners WERE home.  Some RESCUE, isn’t it?  I was forced to listen to this vile garbage for months.  Some “heroes”!

End of the road dirtbag.  FAIL.


  1. @ AU: "Either [animal welfare orgs] are idiots or they think that everyone else is."

    This one ain't either-or; it's both.

    An awful lot of AWOs are made up of unschooled amateurs with 1) a Walt Disney sentimentality about animals, and 2) zero understanding of any of the species they deal with. Unfortunately, the imbecility has -- as far as dogs go -- penetrated into academic circles as well (though there I call it intellectual prostitution); an awful lot of people with PhDs say things as stupid as any amateur would say. So hiring 'experts' often doesn't help much re animal orgs.

    As it is, the AWOs go through the motions of talking about responsible ownership and persuading people to take good care of their animals. But at the same time, and much more strongly, they continue to promote the dog as a consumer article that no one can be denied. They promote a Walt Disney sentimentality that considers it a Shakesperean tragedy if a dog, any dog, is put down. They continue to encourage breeding (never mind what their mouths say, and never mind free spay/neuter clinics), by resisting regulation of dog breeders or any dog breed. I know you'll get tired of hearing it, but I've been around long enough to know this all started with the pit-bull advocacy. If owning a pit bull (and breeding them) is a civil right (or even a Constitutional one), then owning (and breeding) any dog must be. If you can’t chain a dog in your yard, what will 90% of the pit owners do? Take the teeth out of Animal Control, because otherwise they’ll be confiscating pit bulls. If it's a tragedy to (gently BTW) kill a pit bull that has just horribly mauled someone, then it certainly must be a tragedy to put down some non-killer dog. If we don’t take it seriously that (a particular type of) dogs are mauling and killing our children (which the humane societies APPARENTLY don’t), then how can you expect anyone to take mere barking seriously?

    Maybe it’s not so much that the AWO idiots think the rest of us are idiots, as that we’ve proven we are.

    I hope it doesn’t irritate you that I bring up the vicious breeds issue again and again. It’s just that while the barking may seem a separate problem to those who suffer it, and while I recognize that it’s a huge problem and real suffering, I do really think there’s a relation between the two phenomena. I believe that solving the one will solve the other in the end, because once the ‘right’ to own a killer dog is demolished, we’ll have the slippery slope where all other dog-owner ‘rights’ are reduced to privileges that can be taken away.

    [See also my ‘let’s reverse the slippery slope’ comment from awhile ago, at your entry ]

  2. Hello Sweetie Pie:

    I don't take issue with bringing up dangerous dogs, its a very relevant issue.

    Your reply is good enough that I may dedicate an entire post to it. I am hiking this weekend so may not get to it until next week. A few thoughts, though:

    A few words onn "rescuing": Its worth saying that some lives (animal AND human) are simply not worth saving. Again, what kind of a "Rescue" is it if the animal in question is sentenced to a life of misery AND the health and safety of the surrounding community is compromised by this "rescue". In the net, its a lose-lose-lose:
    - The dog loses.
    - The owner loses.
    - The community loses.

    A few words on dangerous dogs: As per my "rock and a hard place" essay, the Pit Bull problem (or something like it) was proverbially "baked in the cake"... When we adopted a culture that favors the interests of individual dogs and dog owners over public safety, a problem of that scope was inevitable. I would not be surprised if the problem became even WORSE given that (dangerous) dog behavior has almost no limits placed upon it. What will they breed next... Cane Corsos? Presa Canarios? Maybe something we haven't thought of yet?