Tuesday, July 15, 2014

More off leash Lunacy

Alternate title “My new buddy!”.

Alternate title #2: “Mother Nature is a Bitch”.

So, here is a fresh photo of my new buddy “Frank”:



Why is Frank such a great gator? Well, Frank is representative of his kind and he presents a great reason why ONLY MORONS LET THEIR DOGS OFF LEASH.


Repeat: If you let your dog off leash you are a douchebag, an idiot and a criminal. You are a shithead with absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever. You are a worthless bag of meat that is not fit for society and I would not feed you to my dog (if I had one). I would say go to hell, but that would be too nice a place for you. I would compost you, but I expect your worthless carcass would grow nothing but Poison Ivy. You deserve to be burned to ash, your remains stuffed into a lead barrel and sealed up in the nuclear waste storage facility at Yucca mountain for all eternity. Got all that? Good.

In any case, I had a nice little trip to Hillsborough River State Park this past weekend. Nice place. I stayed overnight in my little travel trailer. First, I did have some problems overnight with some useless dog barking. Know what, anyone that lets their dog bark at 3am within earshot of anyone else should be thrown head first into a woodchipper, but I digress.

So, I get back from a tour of one of the historic sites on Sunday and I am chatting up one of the park rangers, as I often do. I am no longer a state hike leader, but I still keep up with the various goings on in the park system.

Anyways, I told the ranger lady about my run in with “Frank” and she told me that there was a bad dog-alligator altercation fairly recently. REALLY? Yes, apparently some rocket scientist decided it would be a great idea to let his Labrador off leash (in violation of park rules) to splash around in the river. A resident alligator then proceeded to rip Fido to shreds right in front of the entire extended family and several other park guests!  Hey genius: Your god dog is NOT part of nature. He does NOT understand the risks. KEEP YOUR DOG LEASHED AND ON THE TRAIL.

Surprisingly, the owner took responsibility for the incident. Typically, the dog owner tries to sue the park, even though THEY were breaking the rules.

I don't know what happened to the gator in question (it was not Frank).  It probably had to be destroyed (unfortunately) even though the dog WAS the instigator. Ah, well.   Its bad enough the dog had to die that way due to it's owners douchy incompetence, but its ALSO bad PR for the parks, which have enough problems already.  Note there was no news item on this as far as I could determine.

REMEMBER: NOBODY wants your dog in their space or in their face! Not alligators NOR fellow human beings. YOU dog owners need to respect the rights of others or your dog (and maybe you too) will become lunch.  RuleZ of Nature BitchEZ!

13 comments:

  1. too bad it wasn't a pit bull.

    nature sounds a lot like science, a cold hearted bitch with a 14 inch strap-on :-)

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  2. There is something that has been bothering me about the entire DOG is GOD spelled backwards. If one is supposed to take that symbolism seriously, would that indicate that DOG is the opposite of GOD, like a demon or the Anti-Christ or spawn of Satan? Just a random Sunday morning thought

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    1. Dog is God spelled backwards because people treat their dogs like gods which is ASS backwards.

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  3. Reading your rants is always a cathartic experience.

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  4. Even other dog owners are sick and tired of it: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2703569/MELISSA-KITE-Why-I-hate-arrogant-dog-owners-mutts-control.html

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    1. Good link, Kad. I read the comments section (always the best part) and noted the usual "DOGS WILL BE DOGS CONTROL YOUR KIDS DOGS ARE HERE TO STAY GET USED TO IT" drivel: Its as if there is a contest to see how many logical and ethical fails they can put into one reply! Fortunately, most were against the nuisance.

      Thanks for writing.

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    2. From the comments section of that article

      "How about parents keep their children under control instead? My dog should be free to run around as he sees fit, and if your child gets knocked down well maybe you should have had a closer eye on it! Stop blaming dog owners because you can't handle your kids. Pathetic."

      Seriously, is that guy for real?. I sincerely hope it's simply some troll engaging in "black propaganda". It's depressing to think anybody could genuinely be that stupid. But sadly, it wouldn't surprise me.

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  5. This is one of most issue i really feel great if you love it to please write something about Training dog for a leash

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    1. Once upon a time, I was OK with giving "advice", even if it was simply to follow written community rules. However I no longer bother or care to "educate" anyone: None of these people give a shit, so why should ? The Incident I referred to above took place because an irresponsible dog owner CHOSE to turn his dog loose in a dangerous place IN SPITE of clearly stated park rules. What kind of "advice" is going to cure someone of such rank arrogance an stupidity??

      Moreover, it is not my responsibility to teach the rules of good behavior to other adults. Again, if they step out of line they should simply be punished.

      My estimation is that anyone who can't control their animal and/or allows it to be a nuisance should simply be relieved of their pet privileges. Only a moron takes on a liability without fully understanding what it entails.

      Owner licensing would solve a lot of these problems, BUT I estimate we are unlikely to see that: Even perfunctory licensing would disqualify at least 25% of the current owner pool, which in turn would create a homeless pet crisis as there would not be anywhere near enough licensed pet owners to take on the glut.

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  6. Here's another really excellent article.

    http://www.patriciakirby.com/blog/?p=887

    While I don't believe that these types of articles will do very much to convince the ODOrs to change their ways(they are ODOrs, after all), it's always nice to know I'm not alone in feeling frustrated by this type of thing.

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    1. Interesting article, I'd like to learn more about the author. In any case, the fact that it comes from a fellow dog owner MAY give it some more weight, but the Obnoxious Dog Owner may have no shits to give.

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  7. I cannot tell you the times a stupid dog comes barreling down the beach at my young daughters and me. All the while a shrieking voice in the far off distant "He's frieeeenddddlllyyyyy. He won't biiiiiiite" We are no more amused by your unleashed animal as you are of my children when they are whining in a store. They are a nuisance. But at least my kids don't biiiiite either.

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    1. Yes, and your kids are human persons that deserve greater consideration. Thanks for writing.

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