Sunday, July 27, 2014

Barkmageddon!



For the sake of all that is holy (and unholy) SHUT THE HELL UP!
Time to get back to why I started this blog in the first place:   Incessant, useless, unnatural, infuriating, undogly, ungodly BARKING!

So, I take my little RV to a state park (OUT of my state, I may add) for some time off.  Sunday evening rolls around, and you would NORMALLY expect it to be quiet, as everyone else leaves for the weekend?  Ha!  Guess again, Sherlock!  Some numbnuts pulls in right next to me (even though the place was almost empty).  Nope, he decided to ignore ALL that empty space and park RIGHT NEXT TO ME.

This jackass had one of the most obnoxious robo-barkers I have ever encountered.  It’s some useless little mop-dog, and it shrieked and yelped almost incessantly FOR TWO HOURS.  It emitted this excruciating, piercing yelp that could penetrate clear through a bank vault.  I complained to the park host who said… guess what… “there is nothing we can do”.  DING DING DING we have a winner!

There was no way I could put up with that, so I moved to the other end of the park.  I can STILL hear the little shit barking its head off but at least it’s not intrusive.   Indeed, I have NOT died and gone to Hell.  Well, not yet anyway.

On a slightly better note, the site I now have is a little nicer than the one I had HOWEVER it would have been convenient to NOT have to pack everything up, move the camper, and set back up again on another site.  I had to do ALL of that because… Dog Forbid ANY dog owner be asked to limit their behavior in ANY WAY.   Nope, HE does not have to lift a finger, and I get hours taken out of my evening BOTH to enduring the endless shrieking AND having to relocate all my equipment.  NOPE, they would not even TALK to him about his god dog.

You see, Dog Wills that all of us modify OUR behavior!  We must accommodate Dog at all costs!  Dog bestows special privileges on His High Priests (dog owners)!   OF COURSE nothing can be done… how can mere puny MORTALS interfere in the affairs of Dog?   Why, human civilization is like an anthill next to the Almighty Dog!

We are unworthy!  We have sinned against Dog!  Bring on the BarkMageddon!

10 comments:

  1. Yet another example of the dog owner entitlement mentality.

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  2. I'm crying with laughter after reading that... but yeah, there's nothing funny about a dog that won't STFU and a useless owner who won't even bother to try.

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  3. Idiot "dog"(its really just a shitting/pissing horn wrapped in fur)across my street barks from 7 in the morning to 10 at night.Constant piercing yelps with the occasional "awwww whats wrong Bacon?" from its water headed inbred owner...god forbid she waddle out there and see whats wrong.This is the soundtrack to my life.

    Im going to snap and kill this dog which will lead to my lynching...fuck.Pray for me people.

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    1. Bacon is great on the grill. You should try it sometime.

      Thanks for writing.

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  4. Right on as usual. How long could a human stand in public and screech at the top of their lungs before something was done, like getting hauled off for disturbing the peace? Not frigging long. The same thing should be done to DOGS owners. Haul them to jail for the night; or get a court order to have the thing confiscated, debarked, and sent back to its vapid owner with the bill.

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    1. I hope you at least told the asshat off.

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    2. I did not talk to the owner. Interestingly, the park host came by later and apologized to me for the disturbance and having to move my equipment. I was in a pretty good mood at that point, and I simply said that, if letting dogs bark ceaselessly is the policy, then the policy needs to change.

      Going to war with this particular dog owner in this particular circumstance was not cost effective - this is not someone I am going to encounter again in my life, most likely. HOWEVER, the park service will get an earful after I get back home. I figure 2 hours of complaining should do it.

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    3. I have this fantasy where I go into my neighbors yard and scream "FUCK YOU,FUCK YOU,FUCK YOU!' at the top of my lungs until hoarse.The I go home take a nap rinse and repeat.When did this barking bullshit become OK?

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    4. Anon @ 7:07 - Yes, that is essentially what your neighbor is doing to you, and, yes using their dog as a proxy is totally legitimate (unfortunately).

      The issue is not so much that barking is (unfortunately) totally legitimate, its that ALL dog behavior is deemed legit because... it is dog behavior. Dog lovers have succeeded in brainwashing society into believing that dogs, and dog owners, are ALWAYS the agent of what is good. Therefore, any and all dog behavior is automatically and by definition self legitimizing.

      This extends to deadly dog attacks on humans and other animals - blame everyone except the dog and the dog owner. The question is never "what happened?" or even "how can this be prevented?". No, since society now has an ingrained First Principle of dogs/owners incapable of wrong, the only question is "Since the victim MUST be at fault, WHAT did they do to deserve what happened?"

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